Unhealthy Relationship

Insult his/her significant other in public?

Act really jealous if his/her boy/girlfriend talks to others?

Check in on the other constantly?

Try to decide what the other should do?

Blow disagreements out of proportion?

Threaten to break up, or constantly worry/accuse that the other will break up with them?

Lose his/her temper verbally?

Break or hit things to intimidate the other?

Blame the other for their own problems?

Abuse drugs and/or alcohol?

THIS IS AN ABUSER.

Constantly cancel plans for reasons that don’t sound true?

Always worry about making their boy/girlfriend angry?

Give up things that are important?

Show signs of physical abuse, like bruises or cuts?

Get pressured into having sex, or feel like a sex object?

Have a boy/girlfriend that wants them to be available all the time?

Become isolated from friends or family?

THIS IS A VICTIM.

Why abusers abuse?


Abuse is a choice.
Abusers know what they are doing and what they want from their victim.
If no one speaks out against them, they will continue.

Abuse is about control.
Abusers often feel little control over other aspects of their lives,
so they attempt to control their partner in order to ease this insecurity.

Abuse may follow a pattern.
Abusers may have once been a victim.
Anger and violence may seem like a normal way to express anger and frustration.



Why victims stay?


Love
The victim may have truly deep feelings for the abusive partner,
regardless of the abuse, and is unwilling to leave.

Promises, promises
Abusers may promise that the behavior will never happen again.

It's what they know
The lines between love and being controlled may become blurred
if they've grown up in this environment.
They may not recognize that while abuse may be a normal
part of his/her relationship, it is not normal for a GOOD relationship.

Guilt
Abuse often includes a pattern of blaming the victim and
making the him/her feel as though it is his/her fault.

"No one would believe me"
The victim may feel as though he/she lacks support if they tell the truth.
He/she may also fear being alone and losing family and friends.

"I can change him/her"
The victim may believe the abuser can change over time.

Low self-esteem
After being verbally/emotionally abused, a victim may
feel that he/she can do no better than the current relationship,
or that no one else will want them


www.seeitandstopit.com